Saturday, December 18, 2010

start something

because i want to write, and i don't want to balk because i feel i have nothing profound enough to say.  but i want to look and listen and write and remember.  fragments.  hints.  guesses.

it is saturday and raining and i didn't bring umbrella (on purpose) to the LACMA.  it's good to be so surrounded by water.

c. and i saw william eggleston's "democratic camera" exhibition...  rich images of daily life: magically mundane.  like watching rain fall gently into garbage can.  here's why i admire him: he finds beauty in ordinary things.  that's what i('d) like to do.  one must use strangely contradictory words to describe the same photo.  he saw things and held them.  images and mysteries marked his days.  i like that.


driving to la, c. and i talked about simple ways in which we can live every day beautifully: light candles at dinner, leave lovely notes for dear ones.  assess the remians of each day and constantly strive to live better.  refuse to be discouraged.  never cease to believe in the process of redemption.  always, invite more ideas to come make a home inside.  she is moving across the country soon.  that is inspiring and requires vast amounts of courage.  i love her.

we listened to mumford & sons... decided that a banjo is simultaneously the saddest and most joyful (and so the most soulful) instrument there is.   i think m & s will be important for me.  new beginnings.

'coco before chanel,' starring audrey tautou...  coco's big dark eyes with which she saw and shaped her world.   her guiding principle was her own heart and tastes.  she was a bright, courageous, completely un-passive person.  audrey, 'you have to create your life.  you can't sit passively, waiting for something to happen.'

how to give meaning to life?  help bring joy & spontaneity to the world.  keep writing the pages of my life.  new chapters.  determination.  

       inner freedom
          first violin.

resolution for 2011:  make it the year of 'yes, i did.'  as in, 'yes, i did what i always knew i could, what i always wanted to.' find freedom.  create and share life.  

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